Weird And Wonderful admits to being shy. I get hairs on the back of my neck about certain things. I ignore certain things when I am happy; I think most people do.
At every way possible moment I would avoid a marvellous opportunity to be friends with certain people.
The online/social predator has control over your social circles and manipulates things – they would even retort to bullying which has very servere consequences.
They revert to abusing you in public and others just watch. We live in a world where most of us are beginning to realise “this rat race”….will not last. Suicide rates increasing and people are becoming less likely to socially interact. The deterioration of society probably due to the delinquent behaviour of social predators.
How many times have you come against these characters and what are their traits?
Too many times to mention. Sometimes people think I am one of them because I have been a victim. You know – “no thy enemy” ….. because you get scared when people have abused you in the past.
It is easier to spot their behaviour after you have been subjected to their abuse:
1. They basically lack respect for others.
2. Pretend to be brash and not even bother to be polite.
3. They love confrontation.
4. Create lies and are great manipulators.
5. Tend to exploit others or blame others who are in a worst situation than themselves. These are traits of a sociopath .
6. Betrayal is an art to them – they deny everything when people notice they have caused trouble.
7. Tend to manipulate people for money.
8. When they are in a relationship they tend to put pressure on their partners financially. This is still abuse.
9. They do have a psychopathic personality: finding the weakness in a person and then selectively picking which part to criticise, so they can bully and manipulate.
10. Overly dramatic and love to just create chaos.
I feel the problem is people really think it is okay for others to continue behaving like this. For a number of reasons.
I wish I had known about this personal behavioural trait of people – I would bot have ended up in the situations I had in the past.
They can be male or female. They tend to brag about drugs. I feel that it is okay to be who you want to be; but for me now – your association with drugs means – I will avoid interacting with you because of my own self- preservation.
How do you avoid these characters?
You just keep your witts about you. Alot of people are vulnerable in the world. You must try every effort to create bonds with the most vulnerable people.
Why do you think it happens?
Those whom do not have family around are really vulnerable. These types of people see the vulnerability and would like to control the situation.
It may seem really difficult for others to comprehend but when the person gets their own way they seek the next person to control and manipulate.
The social predator show the least amount of empathy towards individuals who are vulnerable. They have the least amount of values and only want to win.
They would never go out of their way to help you because they have their own agendas.
How do you trust again?
I have no idea. Have not been able to trust many people for a very long time. I too have had to be selective on the friends I choose. This has been for self – preservation.
My biggest problem is trust.
These people are around and they lack the ability to see other people’s points of views. So it is basically trust I lack.
Where were your other family memebers?
They were too busy to actually give a damn about social interaction and give advice on certain types of people.
Would you allow others to fall into the trap of a social predator?
The social predators are really easy to spot if you have been a victim and victims try to avoid the same situations occuring again.
It is really difficult in the workplace to actually avoid social predators. Sometimes they bully people in the most tactful way. If not they make fun of people openly laugh and giggle at them; preferring to be in groups or has a close friend near by to join in with the laughter. Picking on the person who is the pessimist or the odd one out.
It is really important to regard this as bullying, the odd remarks are not okay. If someone feels uneasy about a person – make sure:
1. You listen to them
2. You value the person because they may have been bullied by the social predator
3. Watch the behaviour of the social predator.
4. Try to reduce conflict by not getting the victim to face the social predator.
5. Be honest with yourself about how to help the person.
6. Try not to take sides with either of them and tell the social predator their behaviour is inappropriate.
7. Try to talk to the managers about the behaviour of the social predator.
These seven Steps are hard because the managers are probably social predators themselves.
It is counter productive in the workplace to have a social predator. It would slow the work down because a social predator loves attention to help themselves or to make sure everyone else loses out.
Why is it really important for us to be able to change?
To make sure people do not end up in situations where they commit suicide/self – harm/ are a risk to others.
Why have we become so cut- throat?
Why is life a Drama? Part 1 demonstrates the reasons why we have become so used to the bad behaviour of others. So society is creating these social predators.
Social predators rely on Social Dominance Theory (SDT) – Sidanius & Pratto, (1999); the intergration of groups so they can create dominance over these groups.
Why are you feel like not being a leader?
I may be a pasifist – I just do not really like to draw attention to myself after my experiences. I avoid situations because I am afraid. I do like to help others but only if it is mutually beneficial to me now. Therefore, in a collaborative situation like the work place needs communication and good “bonds” – they are based upon mutual respect and agreements. I feel when I am in situations I create those bonds but the social predator likes to not take accountability for their own actions.
I do take full responsibility and I already state in doing so but I will never lose my dignity over it.
Social predators like to take people’s dignity and respect away.
It is easy to say in a court of law what a social predator is like …. if you have a good lawyer. Others than that you need to be able to be strong and not let that person affect you.
Do we need to change our agendas in society?
Instead of the dog eat dog – assist and gain respect from others in a decent way…. perhaps.
What happens if you have a social predator in your family?
It doesn’t matter how much you try to pretend God will help you. Praying for a person to change will not evoke change.
Do not sit there shoving the bible in family memebers. Listen to one another and try to help the social predator understand the world and others around he/She.
Reality is hard for a social predator to understand and there are ways to help. For example, reasoning and adding ethical questions to situations.
If the family memeber is unable to give reasoning and apply ethical: right or wrong answers or some justification for their behaviour. Do not panic – try to help them develop those skills.
Even if you think their reasons are wrong – try to discuss things and be calm around them. The best thing to do is to make sure they understand there are two sides to a coin.
This is really not beneficial in the world we live in to have the inability to change those whom have these traits.
Remain positive and try to formulate discussions with one another and listen.